Thursday, August 30, 2012

Perks of a Long Distance Marriage...

Let’s talk about the perks of a long-distance marriage, shall we?

  • There’s No Fashion Police! I can wear whatever I want!! Sweatpants, Uggs, garter-belts, Snuggies, leotards, hammer pants, overalls, or nothing at all! You can’t do that with a husband around (especially hammer pants!) without them thinking you’re a weirdo. Its a special kind of luxury that I shouldn’t take for granted. Plus, You never have to worry about how awful you look when you wake up, since no one else is going to see you.

  • You can still harbor some of your secret single behavior that you hide around your significant other for fear of judgement (like drinking bottles of wine and watching lifetime movies, honey boo boo, or teen mom... by myself).
  • You don’t have to fight for the shower first thing in the morning.
  • You get full control of the remote and TV.
  • You can stay up as late as needed reading, writing, working, or dancing around in your underwear without worrying about waking someone up or hearing “Aren’t you going to sleep yet?”  
  • Staying up all night.
  • Examining your pores nightly in a mirror.
  • Coming home late at night and attempting to cook things.
  • Never closing the bathroom door.
  • Talking to your cat. 
  • Never eating actual proper meals. Small bag of Doritos for dinner, why not?
  • Being weird.
Whenever I think about all the people in a long distance marriage living alone, a question comes up:

What if those weird couples living alone become so set in their bizarre behaviors that they can never live with someone, you know, properly?  But I doubt they'll change all of their "quirky" habits then, nor should they really have to. People are weird. I am weird. Living with someone else isn't going to change that. In fact, I can't wait until Derrick just sees how weird I actually am.

Feel free to comment... I would just love to know what you think. =]

1 comment:

  1. the new format looks awesome... and this post is so funny! i still do 3/4 of those things with mike here (and do does he), so i'm sure you guys will be fine even when you do get to live together!! derrick definitely knows how weird you are hahaha